Admit it; you have often asked yourself the question, "What the *beep* is Wrong with Me?"
You know what I mean…
The job you applied for doesn't grant you an interview, even though you feel like the perfect candidate, "I have all of the qualifications, training, and experience, yet I don't even get a call or email. What is Wrong with Me?"
You work hard, volunteer your time and help those around you, but opportunities never seem to come your way, nor is anyone around when you need a hand. Every morning, you wake up feeling beat down, "I'm a good person and bend over backward for other people, yet I have no friends and never get any breaks in life. What is Wrong with Me?"
You look at your social media accounts, and you are bombarded by family, friends, and connections with their seemingly ideal lives; posing in photos of their "perfect family, eating fancy food in elegant restaurants, or vacationing at a resort. Meanwhile, you are eating the leftover pizza from two days ago, with a sink full of dishes and five loads of laundry staring at you. You feel you can't get a moment to relax, "Why is my life so hard? I feel I'm on the go all day long and getting nowhere. I just want to get away. What is wrong with me?"
The "What is Wrong with Me" syndrome can feel like a one-way ticket to Shitsville.
To make matters worse, you read inspiring accounts from entrepreneurs who overcame great odds and became wildly successful. You see social media posts implying you can have anything you desire and live happily ever after in your Narnia mansion. All you have to do is follow three easy steps or click a link for your free "Make Your Life Unshitty in Two Guaranteed Easy-to-Follow Steps" video.
You wonder, "Why doesn't that work for me. I followed those steps, and nothing happened. There must be something really wrong with me. Why can't I be successful and happy?"
Even though there may be tremendous value in the underlying messages, some of that motivational stuff can be demotivating. Those "supposed inspiring" accounts can remind some of what we don't have or is seemingly unattainable. It can make you feel like a failure.
Let's be honest. Life can feel overwhelming, frustrating, and downright maddening, but I have a secret to tell you. There are no three magic steps.
In addition, all the happy motivating posts are written by regular folks who stub their toes, drop their phones in the toilet, get divorced, ball their eyes out, suffer from depression, struggle with serious health issues, have proposals turned down, hate their jobs at times, incur debt, are estranged from their children, deal with leaky faucets, receive parking tickets, feel defeated, get the occasional road rage, bitch that the person in front of them in the 12 items or less checkout line has 17 items, have friends talk shit behind their backs, have cellulose thighs, etc.
Life smacks everyone in the face at times. Life even kicks the self-help guru in the crotch. No one is immune from adversity. That's right, we all take turns riding the crap-mobile, so be prepared to buckle up. The ride is a little longer and lonelier for some of us, but struggles do not mandate misery. I will also tell you that looking for reasons to be miserable will make you, well, miserable.
No matter how challenging your life may be, you don't have to focus on every adverse circumstance/event and keep a running total of "What's wrong with me."
Misery is a choice, and you can change how you feel about yourself by making a different choice. It is an easy choice but makes a profound difference.
The alternative choice starts with, "What is right with me?"
"I am a good person."
"I work hard."
"I have a home."
"I am creative."
"I have one awesome friend who cares about me."
"I am a good friend."
"I can play the clarinet."
"I am friendly."
"I am a good mom, dad, son, daughter, neighbor, etc."
"I am a good provider."
"I have the power and talent to make my life better."
"I am stubbornly determined."
"I am courageous."
"I'm a snazzy dresser."
The choice to see "what is right with you" focuses on you and not your circumstances. Focusing on your strengths, positive qualities, and successes give you power over your circumstances.
Each morning, boldly scream, "I refuse to park my ass in Shitsville and take up residence."
Just remember, no matter where life takes you or how much you achieve, you will still occasionally drop your phone in the toilet because no one on this earth is exempt from going through some shit.